Wednesday, August 21, 2013

A Lovely if Surreal Visit

Last night my friend invited us to join her family in a farewell barbeque at her home for the family of her birth daughter who had come to visit her from the east coast. I wrote about the experience of finding her birth daughter in a blog post on September 30, 2012. Since that time she and her husband made a trip east to become acquainted with her daughter and her family.

During one of our monthly lunches she explained that she had come up with a plan to introduce her birth daughter to her family. She would pay for all immediate family members to come to Oregon and for an extended stay in a local hotel. For the four days she planned for activities and quiet time for them to get to know each other. When they returned to her home yesterday they held the farewell dinner, inviting friends and acquaintances to help celebrate this event. We felt honored to be included and have the opportunity to personally witness this blending of families.

The striking resemblance of newly discovered siblings was amazing. Aunts, uncles, cousins and others joined my friend in a reunion that is so unique and such a surreal visit. While her granddaughters played and entertained us in the wonderful unassuming way of children, the adults interacted in a genuine and caring manner.

It took almost eight years for my friend to make this giant leap in her life to attempt to connect to her daughter she lovingly allowed to be adopted at birth forty years ago. Making such decisions is not to be taken lightly and everyone needs to be on board. Finding the release of contact information by her daughter in the court records was key to this reunion.

At the event the daughter expressed interest in learning more of the family history of her adoptive parents and maybe her birth father. Then another family member discussed with me her Native American ancestry and the desire to know more. I so appreciate the opportunity to be a part of my friends' journey and that of her family. As I looked on it was apparent that this reunion was meant to be.

It is amazing how many people know so little about their families. With the tools available today this process is more easily facilitated than ever before. Knowing where and how to find information is the key to the process. If you are reading this blog you are probably already involved in this process, but if by chance you are hesitating on discovering details of your family please seek assistance and possibly counseling in this journey. I am very grateful to be able to assist others and to share in their surreal contacts upon discovery.

No comments:

Post a Comment